You Made Me a Mom

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Three years ago you made me a mom. I never thought time could go by so fast. There was a time when you were so dependent on me. I cradled you in my arms, you fell asleep on my chest, you cooed and gave me that first smile. You began walking ten days before your first birthday and now here you are, little miss independent, running and jumping, peeing in the potty and telling me, ‘look mom, I did it all by myself and I didn’t even need you’ which while I was so proud, I also felt my heart break a little.

You are doing so much on your own. You are so incredibly smart that you amaze your father and I each and every day. You make us laugh. Your little personality and gentle sweetness make you such a special little girl. I never thought your birthdays would be so hard on me, but they just remind me that you’re getting older, you’re constantly growing and changes will only continue. You’ll eventually go to school, make friends, maybe play sports or an instrument or dance or all…you’ll come across great challenges and great accomplishments, your first crush and first heartbreak and all the things that make growing up so exciting but also a little scary.

But one thing that will never change is that you made me a mom. I will forever be your mother and I will love you with every ounce of me. I love you into the depths of my soul. I love you with a love that only a mother understands. So as you turn another year older, I will try not to cry too hard as I remember the little one you used to be. You will always be my baby girl and you will always be the reason I am so blessed that God made you my daughter and me your mom. This song says it all and every year as your birthday draws near, I listen to it and smile (but mostly cry). You made me a mom and for that, I am forever grateful.

Why I Will Always Love My Mom

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My mom and I are a lot a like. That goes for the good and the bad. Some of the good: we are passionate, caring and loving. We go out of our way for others. We are faithful, honest and giving. We are creative! We love deeply. We never give up. Some of the bad: we are perfectionists, which can cause us to become our own worst critic, we are controlling, which can be good at times but usually it tends to bite us in the butt and we speak what’s on our mind, sometimes too honestly.

Because we are so similar, we’ve had our share of disagreements over the years. As she is now Emma’s primary caretaker, I feel that’s been the biggest struggle for us. It’s not about how much she loves my daughter (which is immeasurable) or her ability to take care of her (she goes above and beyond), but about me being her mom and wanting things the way I want them. It’s hard for me to let go of control, and I think the same goes for her. But our common ground is how much we truly love Emma.

The other day I stayed at my mom’s after work and we had dinner together. We talked about our relationship and how it’s been different. Our conversations revolve primarily around Emma and we don’t get to talk the way we used to. Sometimes I wonder if someone else watched her would our relationship had never changed. However, I am so blessed to have her do what she does three days a week and the bond between them is incredible. Emma loves her MEMA!

There was a moment when my mom was hugging Emma. She told me she reminds her so much of me when I was little. She said she loves us both so much and she started to cry. She told me that it goes by so fast and one day I’ll know when Emma has a baby and she is no longer around (to me, that world doesn’t exist because my mom is going to live forever!). We hugged and shortly after I took Emma home. I thought about what she said..the fact that she now has two grown daughters and one of them has a baby. The surreal experience she feels holding Emma and recalling the moments she held me. I cried my whole ride home thinking about it…thinking about how she must feel and although its primarily love and joy, the little heartache that is there knowing that I am no longer her little baby anymore.

I never want Emma to grow up. I want her to be little forever. It sounds silly but I do. I love her small and I can’t imagine her as a teenager let alone and adult. So what my mom said really hit me. It really made me stop and think. Sure, we can disagree or even get on each others nerves, but when it comes down to it, I will always love my mom. I will always love her for everything she’s done for me and everything she’s given me. For the endless amounts of unconditional love and support, for never giving up on me in my most difficult moments and for all the things she’s done for me over the years that no thank you could ever even express my gratitude. And now, for the role she’s taken on with her granddaughter. There is no one I trust more to take care of her. There is no one that can ever compare.

When you become a mother, you truly understand everything your own mother has said to you over your lifetime. You get ‘when you’re a mother you’ll understand’ or ‘I’m doing this because I’m your mom and I love you’. You get it. You really, really get it because you have that same love for your child. I will always love my mom for the person she is and the mother I hope to one day become. I can’t thank her enough, but I can sure try. Thanks mom for doing what you do, you mean the world to me.

A Mother’s Love


A Mother’s Love

There is no greater gift,
Than that of a mother’s love.
A love that is so immeasurable,
No words can truly speak of.

The gentle touch she knows,
With children cradled in her arms.
The guidance that she gives,
Keeping them away from harm.

She can hold it all together,
When the world is falling apart.
She can mend the littlest of scratches,
And even soothe the broken heart.

She will never stand in judgment,
Only expressions of concern.
Her love is unconditional,
and yet, she expects nothing in return.

There is no greater gift,
Than that of a mother’s love.
Her protection is unwavering,
And inner strength unheard of.

She will never give up hope,
Even when all hope seems to be lost.
She would sacrifice all of herself,
Guarding loved ones at any cost.

With her voice, a smile or a hug,
She can make problems disappear.
The most patient of all listeners,
Her love is always near.

She is the one we turn to,
The one we all call by name.
She is ‘mother’, ‘mom’, ‘mommy’, ‘ma ma’,
But no one mother is the same.

A woman of true grace,
A model for all to see,
There is no love like a mother’s love,
So thank you mom for loving me.

Copyright © 2014 Renee Dzieciolowski, All Rights Reserved.

I wrote this poem for three reasons: my mom, my daughter and myself.

For my mom: I was blessed with an amazing mom and I can truly say she is an unbelievable woman. All my life she has sacrificed so much of her life, herself, her own happiness and selflessly done everything and anything for her children. She is the most incredible role model and I admire her so much. I would not be the person I am today without her (I love you mom!).

For my daughter: I hope one day my daughter will read this and understand, whether it’s when she is a teenager or maybe even married and having a child of her own, how much I love her. My love for her is beyond measure. I know there will be times where she doesn’t ‘think’ I love her or times where maybe she doesn’t love me, but I hope that one day she and I will have the relationship that I have with my own mom. I hope that one day she will feel the same way about me.

For myself: Becoming a mother has completely changed me. It’s not just changed my outlook on life but truly how I live it. I am living my life to be an example to her. I want to be someone she looks up to and admires. I want to be a mother that protects and loves her no matter what, a mother that puts aside being a ‘friend’ for being a ‘parent’ (even if that means she doesn’t like me for it), a mother that gives her all of my love all the time…and finally, a mother that has shown her how to be a true woman of faith the way my mother has shown me.

I am so lucky to have a mother’s love and to be able to give a mother’s love. I wish all of you the same whether your mothers are here or in spirit, whether you are mothers of children or animals, stepmothers, grandmothers, Godmothers, aunts…all mothers! I hope that in some way or another you can experience some form of a mother’s love (remember that Mother Mary is a mother to all!).

To My Daughter…

I love you. I love you more than words can ever explain. I love watching you grow. I love the way you know that I’m your mom, the way you smile at me and the way you snuggle with me. I love the way you get excited and kick your legs. I love it when I’m holding you and you squeeze me. I love your little face and your little toes. I love everything about you.

You are growing…and you are growing fast. It seems like just yesterday you were born and yet it already feels so far away. You will only continue to grow even in moments when I wish time would just stand still. A part of me never wants you to grow up. A part of me just wants to keep you as my tiny baby. A part of me will never forget these times and a part of me someday will really miss them. But you will always be my little girl, even when you’re no longer little.

I miss you on the days I’m not home with you. I can’t wait to see you. I think about what you’ll be like when you grow up, how beautiful you’ll always be in my eyes and the things you’ll do. I sometimes worry about raising you. Am I making the right decisions? Am I doing the right things? Being a mom is tough, one day you’ll understand it, and then you’ll know as I now know when my mother said it to me.

I want to tell you so much. I want to share the world with you. But I want to shelter you. I want to keep you away from harm and evil. I never want anyone to hurt you. I never want you to feel pain. I know this isn’t possible. I know this because it’s part of life…and sometimes life isn’t fair. Sometimes people hurt us and sometimes we hurt ourselves. Life is full of emotions. We feel a lot things. We feel love, joy, happiness, accomplishment and success but we also feel pain, loss, heartbreak, sickness and sadness. There is no limit to what we can or will feel.

At some point, you will feel angry at me, and maybe even resentful. You will tell me that I’m unfair. You will fight with me. You won’t like me. While I can never be fully prepared for this, I will do my best. I know when it will be coming. I know because I was once there. I did these things to my mom. I fought her because she was a good mom…in fact, she was and is the best mom. She had rules and consequences. She cared so much although I couldn’t see it at the time. She never gave up on me.

I will never give up on you. I will never stop being there for you, even when you don’t want me to be. This is my promise to you. I will do my best to be your guide through life. I will raise you hoping that one day when I’m not around (temporarily or permanently) you’ll make the right decisions, the smart decisions and the morally led decisions. I hope you will make these decisions even if everyone one else isn’t and even if it causes others to be mean to you. It’s never easy to go against the majority, but I hope you will be guided by the values I instilled upon you. I will make sure your faith is important to you. God will be your guide through life. You may not always like the answers to your prayers, but one day you’ll understand why things worked out the way they did.

My love for you is unconditional and knows no bounds. I cannot say what the future holds but I know that you will do great things. One day you will go off to college and exude your independence. You will begin figuring out what you want to do with the rest of your life. You will grow into a mature woman. You will be amazing, I just know it. I will always be proud of you, even at times when your feet aren’t firmly planted on the ground. You will make mistakes, and that’s okay. It will never change how I feel about you. I will give you advice when you ask for it, and sometimes when you don’t. I will never stop worrying about you. Never.

You will find a man that treats you the way you deserve to be treated. It may take you a while to find him, but don’t lose hope. I waited 29 years for your father and he was worth the wait…so worth it. I pray that you will find the love I have with him. We will do our best to set the right example for you. Then one day, you will get married. You will leave home permanently. I will have to let you go. I will know that you are safe and happy. You will have a new home but you will always be welcome to where you started. I will always be here for you.

God willing, you have children. Maybe one will be a little girl. You will love her beyond measure and you will truly understand the things I will have said to you all of your life. And hopefully I was a good mom to you so that you can be that same mom but better. We always hope for the best with our children and that I hope for you. And one day when I’m gone, my wish is that you’ll always know a piece of me lives inside of you, deep with your soul. This piece of me that will forever love you because you have made me whole.

Love always,
Your mom