How to Really Get Skinny…

“The key to losing weight is really diet and exercise” says everyone EVERYWHERE! Blah, blah, blah. It’s the same song and dance. You read it in books, hear it on talk shows…everything in moderation, eliminate junk food or what they don’t say but usually ends up happening, trying the latest ‘fad’ diet. I’m here to tell you it’s all bullshit. It always has been and always will be. Anyone who tells you the key to their weight loss was ‘diet and exercise’ is full of shit. Sure, to some extent I bet it was. For instance, the show ‘Extreme Weight Loss Challenge’. They diet and exercise…but do you know how much? I read they work out from 6-8 hours a day. A DAY! Who has time for that?! And they have no junk food, none!

First, I should start off by saying “Damn it Jim, I’m not a doctor!” (that’s for my dad and any of you Star Trek fans out there). But really, I’m not a doctor and/or any medical professional and have no medical degree or background that would make me an expert to speak on this topic. I, however, have lots of medical people in my family ranging from nurses to doctors, but none of whom I consulted with before this post, lol. I also have dealt with a lot of food issues my entire life and have probably tried every fad diet out there (yes, I did the Beyonce ‘Master Cleanse’ diet…I made it four days, HAHAHAHAHA!).

So back to the topic at hand, the secrets to getting skinny. Are you ready? I mean, this is really mind blowing!

Wait for it…..

DON’T EAT! Don’t eat and have lots of stress. I hope you’re laughing but seriously, I’m not kidding. Have you ever seen the show ‘Survivor’? Do you wonder why they’re all skinny? BECAUSE THEY DON’T EAT! Have you ever had one of those stressful busy days where you haven’t even thought about food because it’s been so hectic? Have those every day!

Or, do like I did…move into a new house with a baby and have five weeks to prepare your new house (which is substantially larger than our previous one) for your daughter’s first birthday party that you invited over 100 people to (and 85 RSVP’ed yes!). Yes, the stress of moving, trying to furnish a new home and being a mom caused me to lose weight. Oh, and I didn’t eat. And when I say I didn’t eat, I didn’t. Maybe one meal a day. And it wasn’t on purpose…it just happened. I was too stressed.

Am I happy about this? You know it! I fit into all my pre-pregnancy clothes. But is it healthy? Not at all. The sad reality is, why can’t women just be happy with the bodies we have been given? Why can’t we confidently accept all of God’s gifts without all the complaints (‘my hips are too wide’, ‘my nose is too big’, etc.)? Trust me, I complain. I have complained about my body for as long as I can remember (hence, trying every ‘fad’ diet). But it’s wrong…it’s so so wrong. There is more to life than your body image. There is more to YOUR LIFE!

I want my daughter to grow up in a world where she doesn’t feel like she has to conform to what society deems as ‘beautiful’. I want her to feel beautiful in her own skin. I don’t want her seeing celebrities or reading magazines and believing that’s what she needs to look like. In case anyone has been living under a rock for eternity, those images are Photoshopped! And false advertising! Do you really think those girl’s eyelashes look like that from mascara? Ironically, she’s wearing ‘false eyelashes’. Do you really believe celebrities don’t have bruised knees, scars and cellulite on them? Because they do! They just airbrush them out.

We have become a vain, vain society. We are obsessed with looking better, no matter what the cost. Everyday there is a new product that reverses wrinkles, shrinks your fat, makes you skinnier, gives you more muscles and even surgeries to reduce, enhance or remove anything you want! And why wouldn’t you want to? It’s shoved in your face every chance it can be. And the worst part is we start to believe it. We start to think we need all these products and procedures. Heck, I just said the other day I need Botox! 

So, what can we do? For starters, love and accept yourself the way you are. Get in shape for YOU and no one else. Don’t let anyone make you feel less than beautiful because that’s just what you are. Second, don’t compare. I have a lot of skinny friends with amazing bodies. I let it bother me way too much in the past. Why can’t I look like that? I would think. But then I got over it and myself. How could I be anything less than thankful for what Gos has given me? So I have bigger thighs…that’s just me. I can either dwell on it or accept it. Third, be happy! If a diet is making you miserable then maybe it’s not the one for you! Life is too short to waste it sacrificing your own happiness! And finally, be grateful. You are blessed in your own ways. Find comfort in your own skin. Be confident!!! And most of all, love yourself…because in the grand scheme of things, if you can’t do that first, you can’t love someone else. 

Ps. Before any of you ‘health’ people get all worked up, my post was meant to make light of losing weight. I realize to many degrees diet and exercise can allow for weight loss…so chill:)

One thought on “How to Really Get Skinny…

  1. I blog frequently and I genuinely thank yyou for your content.
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